March 22, 2020: Homeless Man, Television is Essential -

Ramification: I am feeling slightly less crummy, decide to visit my car, get in and drive around a couple of blocks - not hurting anybody, I’m an American and love my car, haven’t even started it in ten days or so, maybe we won’t be driving much for a while*, nobody is on the road, I will pootle around a few blocks and go back to bed. (The preceding sentence is a white lie. I will come clean in the end.)

I see a man bedding down against a wall, thin blanket, it’s about sunset. He is the only person I see. I stop and – from far away – say “How are you holding up?” Absolutely inane question, I know. Just saying howdy. We lock eyes.

He considers saying “Okay,” but why? He says, “It’s AWFUL.”

We pause. I say, “I can’t help you because I’m sick and you don’t want to touch anything I have touched.”

He says, “I already have it.” He means COVID-19.

We consider the possibilities. We just take a moment to do all of the ramifications, in silence. Short term. Long term. Neither of us knows for sure, right? I might not have it. He might not have it. No tests.

I realize that regardless, I’m keeping my distance.

I realize he is not in a shelter because he is taking one for the herd and self-isolating. On the street.

He realizes that even though we both think we have it, I am afraid to approach him. We just sit there, ramifying away.

I am not at my absolute sharpest, honestly, but I have an idea. I say, “Okay. Here’s what is going to happen. I am going to take this money out of my wallet and I am going to put it in that planter, way over there. I will stuff it down between those little plants so it won’t blow away. And then I’m leaving.”

He says, “Thank you, darling.”

*Conversation: Our back yard opens onto an alley. I have emerged for a minute and our neighbor drives down the alley. Quiet neighbor, several houses away, maybe a handful of conversations in 35 years, usually if she drives by (very very slowly, old and narrow alley) while I’m in the backyard, she waves, we don’t chat.

But she stops and rolls down her window, and proceeds (from many feet away) to tell about how she is just back from visiting her aged parents, setting out their meds for the coming week.

(So many aged parent stories online – from the lonely aged parent in lockdown to the active grannies who will not stay home because they are fearless (my Scottish friend Claire whose hilarious posts are all in dialect: Anyane near Kilcannon please pass by me Mam’s place and shoot thru the letterbox at her to SIT the FOOK DAHN and STAY HOOM, bifair she KILLS the whole wee TAHN (Let's pause here while I wipe my eyes becauses I made myself laugh. I can't do a Scottish accent. I have no idea how. I could have just gone and copied Claire's post, but it was SO MUCH FUN to try to fake a Scottish accent, I had to give it a go, however terrible the result HAHAHAHAH. )))

Triple parentheses are a big score!

Ahem.

Neighbor says she has been furloughed from her job at the airport (makes sense) but they will be okay because her husband is in an essential industry. What does he do?

He’s in television.

I’m not at my sharpest. It takes me a minute. Inside my head, I start with well, yeah, we will all go crazy if we have nothing to watch for weeks, but … OH, like without television (etc.), we will have no idea what is going on. Good point!

Neighbor says: starting Monday, it looks like no one will be allowed on the road unless they are doing something essential, going to an essential job, but my husband already has his papers, he is good to go.

*This is why I decided (above) to take the car around the block. I know, dumb, but I thought maybe for a while I wouldn't be able to get in my car without papers, and I wanted to just drive for a minute while I was feeling slightly better. I didn't hurt anybody. I hope. I hope I didn't hurt the guy who dug the money out of the planter.